Holidays After Loss

The holidays are a time to get together with friends and family, enjoying the company of those that we may not often get to spend time with.  The holidays are also a time when we notice who is not with us anymore.

They say the first year after you lose someone is the hardest.  That’s because every milestone, every holiday, every event is the first time you’ve been through that day without that person.  Last Christmas was definitely a challenge.  It was exactly 2 months after our son’s birth and death.  Even though we had known the odds were that he would not be with us for Christmas it was still hard.  I remember one TV commercial in particular with a new family at home for their first Christmas together which prompted me to change channels everytime it came on.  I was thankful for the family I did have around me and to be surrounded by their support and love.

This Christmas, like every other holiday since baby Theo left us, we will find our own way to honour his presence in our lives. I believe these rituals are important; they allow us to acknowledge that our son is still an important part of our lives and that he will always be a part of our family celebrations.  Loss is a part of life, but I believe that as long as our loved ones are in our hearts they will always be with us.

To all those that are navigating their first holiday season without a loved one, I wish you peace.  Practice gratitude for all those who are with you today and make sure you give yourself the time and space you need to heal.  Give yourself permission to feel what you need to feel – the people who are close to you will understand if you can’t attend every event.  If you are ready, create your own ritual to honour the presence that person had, and still has, in your life.

Wishing all a peaceful and loving holiday season!

Namaste